Reversing high sensitivity - from complaint to resilience!

Are you sensitive, caring and empathetic? Do you have a great sense of responsibility, strong intuition and attention to detail? Then you might be highly sensitive. HSP has many wonderful sides, but they often get snowed under in a society focused on quick action, production and quick results. This prevents you from using your HSP talents and you get stuck in:

  • Feeling the emotions of others so well that you no longer know what is yours and what belongs to the other person. You may feel too much or almost nothing.
  • Having difficulty making choices, causing you to procrastinate and fret.
  • Opinions, feelings and thoughts of others directly affect your emotions and self-esteem.
  • Difficulty feeling and indicating your limits, for example, causing you to silently blame, feel frustrated, anxious or exhausted.
  • Fear of failure, which makes you spend a very long time preparing for e.g. presentations, or you don't even start at all.
  • Do you sometimes lash out when that doesn't fit who you are at all.
  • Empty into conversations that have little depth.

You are not alone...

1 in 5 people are highly sensitive, also called highly sensitive person - HSP. In short, this means that a person's nervous system is stimulus sensitive. The brain of HSP works differently than that of non-HSP; all details are perceived and the information from them is deeply processed. This allows an optimal choice to be made. Unfortunately, this also often causes HSP to get stuck and not dare to make choices - one of the disadvantages of high sensitivity.

So, high sensitivity is a trait that makes you more sensitive to your environment.

Researcher Elaine Aron distinguishes 4 characteristics of high sensitivity:

  • In-depth processing of information
  • Over-stimulation (but some HSP also suffer from under-stimulation)
  • Emotional intensity (feeling)
  • Sensory sensitivity (senses)

Hypersensitivity can be quite a block to enjoying your life. HSPs suffer considerably more from (growing up in) negative circumstances than non-HSPs. For example, they are more sensitive to stress and rejection. But ... they also benefit more than average from coaching and therapy and flourish more in a supportive environment. Not for nothing are they also called 'orchids'!

Too sensitive...

As a little girl, I was already painfully aware that I was "different" from other kids. I had girlfriends, but in (small and large) groups I often felt uncomfortable. I would dream away or talk a lot because of the tension. Meanwhile, I sponged off all the unspoken negative feelings of everyone. At the same time, I was often bothered by remarks like "don't be such a pain" or that I reacted too sensitively. I did not want to be a burden to anyone, so I started to please and completely removed myself. I subordinated my own wishes, boundaries and feelings to those of others.

That was not sustainable, so I had poor concentration, felt insecure, suffered from fear of failure, stomach aches and could react very emotionally. That, of course, caused rejection and so the circle was complete again. 

Over 20 years ago, I first read something about high sensitivity. What a feast of recognition that was! I learned that I was not "too sensitive" and that listening to my body's signals did not mean that I was acting up, but actually made me a much nicer person. For those around me, but especially for myself!

Over the years, through many hours of literature study, coaching, workshops and training, I have really learned to turn my high sensitivity from burden to strength. HSP talents like being empathetic, resilient, analytical, deliberate and having great empathy now serve me very well. Both privately and in my work, my life has become much more colorful.

My knowledge and skills as a coach, combined with my own experience as an HSP, I now like to use to walk along the path of other HSP. So that more and more HSP are empowered.

What does an HSP coaching program get you?

Learning to use your HSP talents

If your high sensitivity feels like a burden, an HSP coach can guide you to experience and use the talents of this trait. I am happy to help you make the strengths of your high sensitivity work for you.

As an HSP coach I offer (scientific) knowledge about the trait of high sensitivity, help you understand what this means for you personally, what your triggers are and how you can deal with them differently. Over-stimulation decreases. You experience peace and more connection with yourself. You will work with healthy boundaries, so you can make choices that suit you. You also dare to be more and more your authentic self. Together we go in depth, so you can really use your HSP talents! 

Clients often give me back that they feel safe and therefore dare to explore the deeper layer: 

"With Xandra, I felt seen, heard and understood. Because I felt safe, I dared to go deeper and, as a result, was able to change my life permanently. I now dare to choose for myself." - Nathalie, 29

I give you clear and simple tools, so that you can turn the burden into your strength as an HSP. In this way you can make a lasting change in your life.

This is you after our collaboration:

  • You have embraced this part of yourself and are happy with yourself and your sensitivity
  • You have more self-confidence and dare to trust your intuition
  • You have a grip on your emotions
  • You cope better with stress and cope better with overstimulation
  • You have more energy and experience inner peace
  • You can distinguish which feeling is yours and which is the other person's
  • You dare to guard your boundaries and it does not come at the expense of your relationships

What does the HSP program entail?

In this coaching program, we will work together for 6 to 8 sessions to transform your high sensitivity from task to gift.

How does it work?

In personal coaching sessions (both live and online) you will gain insights into how this characteristic hinders you and what you yourself can do to break through obstructive patterns and overcome overstimulation. You will experience where your strengths lie and together we will work towards your goals, more peace, self-confidence and fun.

I work from a holistic perspective and deploy a mix of exercises and methods aimed at restoring the connection between your head, body, heart and intuition.

What you get when you choose this program

What makes this program different is the high quality* and personal attention that I offer you. You are number one in this program!
Prior to the program, during the deep-dive we explore your unique situation and discover if there is a click. 
We always start the program with a comprehensive kick-off session, where we further explore your coaching question and clarify it where necessary. At the end of this session, you will already have new insights and concrete to-do's. 
Then, during 1-on-1 two- to four-weekly 90-minute coaching sessions, we get down to business with practical exercises and valuable, insightful conversations. Among other things, you will learn to reconnect with your body. 
In a wrap-up session , we look back at your accomplished goal(s) and personal growth by creating a first aid kit - First Aid For Over-stimulation - plan. 

During the program you will work with personalized exercises and gain interesting knowledge, so that you can learn to cope with overstimulation and better use your HSP talents. This way you take control of your program. 
You will receive personal support during the process via email, WhatsApp or simply by phone (fair use policy). 

After our collaboration you will reap the benefits of your high sensitivity. You feel less and less often overstimulated and experience peace within yourself. In contact with others you know what is yours and what is the other's and you are better grounded. You are better at guarding your boundaries and that is good for your energy level and self-confidence!

*thisperfectionist HSP doesn't deliver half-assed work either (-;

Contents coaching program high sensitivity
"HSP - from complaint to resilience!

6 months
HSP - from complaint to resilience!

  • Personal deep-dive before the start of the programme
  • 2-hour kick-off
  • 6 to 8 personal coaching sessions (90 min.).
  • Closing session & evaluation
  • First aid kit with your personal stimulus plan - First Aid for Over-stimulation
  • Personalised exercises
  • Personal support via e-mail, WhatsApp or telephone
  • Bonus! Nice reflection book for taking notes, keeping track of your progress and to-do's

Do you doubt that you are HSP?

There are several over-the-counter questionnaires you can fill out to investigate a suspicion of high sensitivity. The disadvantage of these questionnaires is that some questions are somewhat vague or broadly interpretable. This obviously affects the results. In addition, high sensitivity is not always a major stumbling block because it is a stress-sensitive trait. So it may be that one time you would check everything and the other time you would just be/not be highly sensitive.

Yet, high sensitivity is a constant trait; you cannot be "a little" high-sensitive or get it "all of a sudden. You either are or you are not.

If this applies to you.

  • You are not sure if you are highly sensitive
  • You would like a professional to look on
  • You are looking for a comprehensive analysis so that you can learn in which areas you are highly sensitive
  • You are curious about the talents of your high sensitivity

Then the high sensitivity analysis (HSA) is for you!

This analysis was developed by HSP researcher Esther Bergsma and should be performed by a professional who has completed a training or master class with her.

First, you fill out the questionnaire with 55 questions. During the analysis we examine whether you are highly sensitive and together we look at the impact this has on your daily life. You will not only gain insight into the burden of your high sensitivity, but also into what can help you deal with it.

The high sensitivity analysis takes 1.5 hours and costs €150. You can sign up via the contact form.

Are you also curious if you are highly sensitive or would you like to know how I can help you with this?

Feel free to make your appointment in my calendar.

Schedule your appointment now!